7/14/2023 0 Comments Timecop van damme![]() Unusually for any franchise, the later Universal Soldier films are the best-renowned - 2009’s Regeneration and 2012’s Day of Reckoning are almost universally agreed to be considerably better than the four that came before them. They might as well have filmed it using an endoscope. There’s another scene in Death Warrant where Van Damme has a minute-long conversation with the late, great Robert Guillaume (of Benson and voicing Rafiki in The Lion King fame), where Guillame is seated and a very sweaty Van Damme is stooped over the table, and it’s pretty much photographed up Van Damme’s denimed a-hole. If you’re doing a prison movie, you show the camera your bottom. And who suits “business in the front, party in the back” more than Jean-Claude Van Damme? He’s in the business of kicking people in front of him in the head, and out back, well, he’s constantly flexing the muscles in his bottom - what a party! While there’s no nudity in Hard Target, Van Damme does constantly seem like he’s clenching. It’s a totally fine hairstyle, it just sometimes finds itself on the wrong heads. Can former firefighter Darren McCord both subdue a crew of terrorists and make the final of the Stanley Cup go into overtime? Or will the villainous Powers Boothe’s plan - pay him the specific but cartoonish sum of one billion, seven hundred million dollars or “everyone in this box and in this arena will die, by explosion, fire and panic” - come to fruition? Despite being excellent - at one point Van Damme is in real danger of being killed with a meat tenderizer wielded by a one-eyed giant penguin - it’s one of JCVD’s less glute-centric films. Sudden Death is great, and one of many 1990s Die Hard -a-likes. This is by no means a complete list - the guy has 75 credits on IMDb - but there’s plenty of Belgian butt in here for everyone. With that in mind, here’s a look at some of his rear end’s moments in the sun. ![]() Dude’s constantly getting it out or clenching the fuck out of it, tensed buttocks stretching the fabric of his unusually high-waisted slacks. Hockey is replaced with basketball (a sport that doesn’t use the term “sudden death” but whatevs), a firefighting past is replaced with one in the military, and unlike Van Damme, White doesn’t seem like he’s constantly tensing all of the muscles in his bottom.īut you think Van Damme, you think ass. The follow-up is Van Damme devoid, instead starring the awesome Michael Jai White ( Spawn, Black Dynamite ), who has formerly starred opposite the Muscles From Brussels in 1999’s Universal Soldier: The Return. This week saw the release of Welcome to Sudden Death, a reboot of the 1995 Van Damme firefighter-turned-security-guard hockey/assassination film. When a statue of him was unveiled in his native Brussels, people tried to stick their finger in its butthole. His famous cameo in Friends mentions his ability to crack a walnut with his buttocks (btw, the world record for doing this stands at 43 nuts in one minute, held by Japan’s Tomoharu Shoji ). ![]() An appearance on Conan immediately becomes a conversation about asses. It’s not the most common thing, an action star being famed for how frequently the camera lingers on his clenched buttocks, but ass is marbled through his career like fat through a steak. Like, he could obviously beat you up in a fight, but also, if you entered an Ass Notoriety Contest with him, his ass could beat your ass. MT2008 The weapons were made by Dlask Arms Corp.Jean Claude Van Damme could beat your ass. 44 Magnum Desert Eagle, and he also mentioned that the gun was originally built for this movie even though it's been re-used on the Stargate shows. The show's armorer, Rob Fournier, specifically said in an interview that it's a. Like the Timecop Beretta, this gun was used on Stargate: Atlantis. At the beginning of the scene, the weapon is represented as some sort of shotgun, with a 'rack' and then it fires large single shots which obliterate furniture, however, by the end of the scene, the weapon is depicted to be a pistol with a racking foregrip. 44 Magnum Desert Eagle Pistol, but with a larger futuristic shell. This science fiction Short barreled rifle (SBR) is in reality a modified. This gun is used by Lyle Atwood ( Jason Schombing) as a personal defense weapon when Walker goes back to the 1920's to arrest him. Timecop Personal Defense Weapon with racking foregrip (modified Desert Eagle) Max Walker ( Jean Claude Van Damme) has the "Timecop" handgun put to his head.
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